Take my review on Vaccinated: This is a hot-button topic for me as a mother of a child on the autistic spectrum. But, I reviewed it in a balanced way - I explained what I liked about the book, and then how I was concerned that parts were too black and white. Subsequent exposures to Dr. Paul Offit have made me very frustrated, but what I said in the review remains accurate. My readers know that I have serious reservations about some of these issues and I have since mentioned this book in other posts. But, I'll admit that I'd be reluctant to review another book on vaccines, and I'd probably shy away from many "autism" books as well, just because I have very strong feelings about these topics. (Like I know I won't review any of Jenny McCarthy's books because I already think they are too polarizing. Just as Offit won't consider any environmental factors, McCarthy won't consider genetic factors. Both view autism too narrowly.)

Other reviews here are from direct product pitches that I receive. Again, this turns out to be a self-selecting situation because I don't request most of the products or services I learn about via email. Some don't seem like a good fit, others come at a point where I am too busy to give the product the appropriate scrutiny to write a review.

Typically these direct pitches aren't part of a timeline, whereas the reviews through the product review organizations are scheduled. For Mom Central, PBN, and BlogHer, I am given a specific review day or timeframe during which to post my review. In that respect, the direct pitches are "less accountable" than the formal reviews for an organization, and that has created some controversy as well in the blogging world.

For example, I've heard some bloggers and PR professionals complain that other bloggers request large amounts of products but then don't post a review.

I can see how this is dishonest and misleading: if a blogger requests a product, there is definitely an expectation that the blogger will review the product.

BUT. And yes, there is a "but."

If a blogger is required to review all products that come his/her way, then the reviews would likely be less honest. Also, if there is no timeline for review, it may be that the blogger has not yet had an opportunity to post about the product.

Consider the situation where a former employer is listed as a reference on a job application. When the representative from the new position phones, the former employer can only confirm that the applicant once worked there. If the former employer states anything negative, that individual can be charged with slander. This seems ridiculous - after all, if a former employee was terrible, one would hope the potential new employer could be given that warning.

Similarly, there has been chatter about bloggers being sued for "slander." Does this mean we can't post negative experiences about a product because the company can come after us? Keep in mind that these are our experiences. And like other things posted on a blog, our experiences aren't necessarily the experiences of the person sitting next to us, or in another state, or in another country.

As you may have guessed, I have some products that I received from direct pitches but I haven't reviewed. There are a couple that I fully intend to review, but haven't been ready to yet. There are others that I will never review.

In one case of the former, it is a "children's" book that is over 500 pages. Its length is a strike against it right off the bat, because my son hasn't yet been interested enough to tackle it. (I admit that I need to just start reading it to him - if his interest is piqued, perhaps he'll then want more - either me reading aloud or him reading on his own.) When it came in the mail, my heart sunk, because although the subject matter appeared of interest, such a large and heavy tome is just intimidating.

In another case of the former, it is a product that I simply haven't had an opportunity to try yet. It is for a specific situation. Once the occasion arises, I will try it and report back.

As for the products which I received but will not blog about:

One such product was a book written by an amateur author. The subject matter as she pitched it sounded fabulous. It seemed like it would be a great story, and I intended to let my son read it once I was done. Unfortunately, when it arrived I was disappointed.

There were typos right and left. The grammar was poor. I couldn't get past the introduction. Meanwhile, an email discussion grew amongst others who had received the same book. Some who read the whole thing remarked that it hadn't improved further along in the book.

I certainly didn't want to shoot down this new author. I want to encourage people to write. But I just couldn't endorse her book. Rather than publishing a bunch of negative reviews, we decided we simply wouldn't mention it. We hoped our silence "spoke" for itself to the author and hope that her friends and family will encourage her to get a good copy editor next time she tries to write.

Another product that I won't end up posting about is a children's DVD. Again, the description as pitched sounded good, but the DVD itself was disjointed. It was meant to be educational, but the topics jumped around so much that it was impossible to focus on what was being taught. My five-year old saw it for a little bit, but then declared it "boring." I kept it on "repeat" in case he wanted to come see it again (as he tends to do with DVDs) but he actually requested that I turn it off.

Again, instead of posting a negative review, I decided to just stay silent. After all, some kids might love this DVD, so their word-of-mouth will be positive. But if there are crickets in the blogosphere, the DVD has less publicity overall, which might be deserved. And yes, I don't want to be terribly negative for a new company just trying to promote their product. I don't want to crush dreams (not that I am that powerful) nor do I want to say something that will then get me sued!

Now, had this particular DVD been a compensated review or set up via one of the aforementioned organizations, I would have posted a balanced review - I would have explained what I liked about the DVD, but I would have also had to mention the rather lukewarm to chilly reception it received from my son. I would have put in the effort to review the DVD in a thoughtful way because as an extension of those review organizations, it is important to uphold my end of the bargain.

But I don't have the time to write a thorough review for a product that didn't click with me or my family if the only "compensation" was the product itself, sent to many many other bloggers. Some may disagree strongly with me on this point. But would you rather have a negative review, or no review? Along the same lines, must I post about every single product I receive at a conference like BlogHer?

I agree, it is tough. I'd like to give a shout-out when companies are generous. Sometimes I do feel like the right thing to do is to mention a product, even if the review wasn't explicitly agreed upon. But sometimes I think the right thing to do is to not mention it.

In the cases where a company has hired an organization to post reviews, then YES we are being hired to review the product and will do so in an honest and thoughtful way. But if the company is just giving me a product sample, then I don't see the obligation as being nearly as high. (And in the case of completely unsolicited product samples, there should be no obligation.)

Some other "quick" points:

- I have never defaulted on an organized review. If I agree to review a product for the Parent Bloggers Network, Mom Central, or BlogHer, I will post on time. I will write an honest review. I have never missed a review for any of these organizations.

- People's concern over the money issue is funny. I used to do focus groups that paid $50-$200 for about 1-3 hours worth of work. Believe me, reviewing a product takes much longer than 1-3 hours worth of work. Although many of these products are fun, the writing-about-it takes awhile. And so, receiving a product that is usually worth around $20-50 is not such a high compensation that we're all a bunch of greedy misfits. Even in the case where an honorarium was bestowed, the "per hour" charge of such a thing is piddly compared to working at the local fast food joint. The reason I - and many others - review products is because it is interesting and is informative for our readers.

- Even if I say "yes" I want to receive your product, don't fear if I don't review it immediately. I may not get an opportunity to give it the attention it deserves (such as attempting to review a 500 page book before the whole thing is read!) or it may turn out to not be a good match for our family. But, even if one product isn't a good match, that company name might stick in my head enough so that if a different product ends up impressing me or my family, I'll write about it. I mentioned this "ripples" concept during my little "MommyBlogging Marketing" mini series:

MommyBlogging Marketing That Works:

- Ripples from the Johnson's Camp Baby experience

- BlogHer Swag Winners

- Continued relationships with companies for which I've done reviews

MommyBlogging Marketing: When it Doesn't Work:

- Be Organized

- Know Your Audience - Trust the Blogger

I should probably note that the negative impressions of companies have their ripples as well. There are some companies from which I've considered purchasing products in the past, but then they've been rude enough in review situations that I've decided I won't support them. I don't yell from the roop-tops my intentions, but I speak with my dollars.

In the end, that is what we bloggers are doing: we tell people our impressions, speak with our dollars, and watch the ripples. We aren't "professional" reviewers per se, and yet we are real people who have opinions. We post our impressions, which are only our own; our readers and the companies we mention must know that we are writing as ourselves on our blogs. Yes, sometimes we are hired to post reviews on certain topics - I did the Crystal Light Water Way Challenge and was compensated - but that doesn't take away our ability to be honest; for example, I talked about how I worry about the artificial flavor and color in Crystal Light.

I enjoy sharing my impressions here, and it would be a shame if these review programs were shut down because of worries of slander or concerns that we're all being paid "lots" of money to say things that we don't really believe. Sure, there are probably people taking advantage of bloggers' popularity by requesting lots of products without an intent to review, but I assure you that when I accept a product pitch, my intent is definitely to give it a fair chance - whether I then post about the item or not depends on my assessment of the quality of the product and its match with our family.

Thank you for reading!