I have also posted this review on the Karianna Spectrum; however, it seemed appropriate to stick it here as well.
Nearly two months ago I mentioned John Elder Robison's book, Look Me in the Eye. I then posted a clarification regarding my thoughts on the media portrayal of autism and/or spectrum disorders. Of course, since I hadn't yet read the book, I couldn't talk about it in specific.
Well, I've now read the book! (Funny how going away for a few days without kids suddenly opens up time for reading.)
It was a fairly quick read because it caught my attention. I couldn't put it down.
Yes, I saw parts of the Cat in it, but I also saw myself, and surprisingly, I saw my father. There were plenty of things in there that didn't resonate with my family, but that is true because we're all different people, regardless of what quirks we may possess.
My speech used to be more robotic than the Cat's is, for example. In fact, hearing the Cat read books aloud is adorable because he puts in beautiful inflection. Is that learned? Yes, but also no. When he speaks to us, I don't hear an "Aspergian" voice.
The bit that made me think of my father is that Robison used to purchase old cars to restore. He'd sell them once they were perfect. My dad used to do that all the time. We often wondered why he wouldn't enjoy his own work, but Robison explains, "... I realized there was a fundamental problem with my Porsche: There was nothing left to fix. So I sold it and found another Porsche to restore..." (pg. 49) Perhaps my dad is a problem-solver in this way, too. He has since moved on to lots of home improvement projects, much to my and my brother's benefit!
Interestingly, the little boy with whom the Cat had a playdate with several weeks back has more of some of the characteristics Robison describes. The Cat and his friend "Hunter" had a playdate yesterday actually, and I was relieved to see that he is plenty quirky. In fact, the Cat did phenomenally as a guest, and I was understanding when Hunter suddenly decided he really, really wanted to be alone. I saw his frustration with us "changing" the way he would typically play with toys and noted other Aspie-type rigidity. Of course, I will not play "Diagnosis," because as far as I know Hunter is doing just fine socially at school, but I am glad to see that another child possesses some of those quirks that other people have considered so problematic in the Cat.
Many of the events portrayed in Look Me in the Eye scare me as the mother of two sons, both energetic, and both quirky in their own ways. Blowing things up, talking about violent things, getting lost, and all that scary psychoanalysis stuff also portrayed in Running with Scissors (by Robison's younger brother Snort Varmint Chris Augusten Burroughs) that many are familiar with. My hope is that my boys won't be quite so adventurous!
What struck me aside from the pure entertainment value of the book is the introspection: the concept that as Robison became more practiced in the ways of relating to neurotypicals, he "lost" some of his mathematical gift. This is something I ponder fairly frequently, both as regards my own intellectual and social development and that of the Cat. The spectrum is not linear: there are levels within the levels of different talents and adaptabilities.
Look Me in the Eye is an interesting read - entertaining, but quite thought-provoking.
