Well, the Warrior Dash definitely lived up to its advertising, "The craziest frickin day of your life."

When I arrived, I smelled both the fire for the "fire leaping" and for the turkey legs. I saw a large inflatable viking helmet and plenty of signs for beer. My race bib had a little tab for one free beer. Some chose to down their freebie before the race, even though we signed a waiver saying we wouldn't consume alcohol before going on the course. I saved mine for after. (The poor beer guys had to take many muddy tags from people post-race.)

I wandered over to the fire-leap section and the mud-crawl section to see just what I'd have to deal with at the end of the race. I had a few lumps in my throat as I watched the crew pile duralogs on the flames. Could I really clear the two rows of flame?

And then the mud pit definitely looked messy, although I knew that I'd be small enough to clear the barbed wire while on my hands and knees.

I knew there were many more obstacles, but those were hidden from the spectator area. We'd be running towards the unknown, but I knew how the race would end, provided I wasn't hitching a ride on one of the multiple ambulances parked around the course. (By the time I left the venue, at least three people had been taken away.)

I signed up for the third wave, which meant I got to watch two sets of racers go off before it was my turn. "Pyro the Clown" did the honors by shooting fire into the air to signal the start. About 15 minutes later I eagerly watched as the fastest of the first wave approach the fire and the mud. The third person to come in ended up getting hurt, though I didn't see it. Eep!

Once the second wave started (30 minutes after the first) I brought my various possessions back to my car. I knew my phone and other things wouldn't survive the mud pit. I entered the starting corral - feeling very naked without my phone or a watch - and waited...

The fiery start came quickly, and I happily started the run. It was downhill the first portion, and then we encountered a few sticks and gentle slopes. Someone joked that we had cleared the first "obstacle" but most of us were skeptical. We had to jump over some cow bones here and there, avoid manure, and duck under some tree branches, but really there was nothing mega-challenging.

I walked over some of the bumpy sections because I feared that if I treated this like a "real run" I'd not have enough energy to complete the obstacles. I was particularly concerned about having enough upper-body strength to complete things like the anticipated rope climb. I need not have worried, though, and next time I tackle something like this, I'll run.

The first official obstacle was climbing over five cars ("Junker Jump.") It was easy to just hop on the hood and then hop down, rinse and repeat. I didn't want to get my fingers slammed, though, so would wait until the person in front of me was off the car.

We then ran a bit uphill, and wound past the portion of the course that leads to the fire leap. We saw the big "Caution - FIRE!" sign, but I knew it would be some time before I was in that lane.

The second obstacle was a bungy-cord maze ("Warrior Web") that we had to crawl under. Warrior Dash Staff members yelled at us to "get down." Well, I did, and realized that I can crawl very quickly. I passed a whole bunch of big dudes, and the staff yelled, "Oh my God, look at that girl GO!" I felt super-fantastic because I literally left those dudes in my kicked-up dust.

We then scaled a "Hell's Hill" which was pretty short in comparison to the ones I encounter on my trail races. Still, steep climbs are no joke, so my heart was pounding as we approached the "Walk the Plank over the Gully" obstacle, where "plank" was a slippery-by-mud piece of wood about 5 feet long, and "gully" was only maybe a 3 foot drop. Still, I didn't really want to drop, possibly twisting my ankle or breaking my ego. I tried three different beams before I found the least-slippery one - and, success!

"Cargo Climb" was next: a rope ladder (the "cargo net") that went maybe 12-14 feet in the air onto a platform, then another net to go back down. "Climb down, not leap" the staff instructed, but someone decided to jump, and was carted off in an ambulance. The climbing was easy for me, but getting onto the platform was a bit challenging because there was nothing to grip. But then I was up, and over. Easy-peasy.

I easily jumped over the five walls in "Warrior Wall" and approached "Knee-High Hell," the tire-jump. Yup, I tried to race through 'em, but caught my ankle on one tire and went down. The folks behind me gasped, but thankfully I didn't actually put weight on the ankle when it twisted. I got through the next several rows of tires, and then did a "victory" salute to the folks behind me, who cheered. (They then told me my skirt was up my butt, so I did some adjustments...)

"Tunnels of Terror" was tiring because the packed dirt was hard, so my crawl thought the tunnel was slower than it had been under the bungy cords. Next up was "Hay Fever," climbing up and then down a staircase made of hay bales. Simple! The staff yelled, "Three more obstacles to go! You are almost there!"

Oh boy, I'm almost there! I knew the two last obstacles were right there together in front of all the spectators. This is it.

"Satan's Slip and Slide" was not so much evil as it was funny. Yeah, I slid on my belly as fast as I could, and got drenched in the process, and also covered in soap bubbles. As I ran towards the fire leap, I was glad to be completely wet, but of course the added weight made "running" a bit harder.

And then... the "Warrior Roast."

As I approached the rows of fire, I saw a staff member replenishing it with duralogs. Oh, NO! Yup, the fire climbed higher, but I made like Tigger and bounced over the flame with a "yip!" and a wave to the crowd. I then lowered myself into the "Muddy Mayhem" (no, I didn't belly-flop like some participants) and crawled through 2-foot deep mud while ducking under barbed wire. Thankfully, I'm small enough so I didn't really need to duck. That said, the slog through the mud was definitely slow, and I ended up with an impressive breast-plate of mud by the time I emerged on the other side.

I then gave a huge smile and ran across the finish line - I am Warrior!

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The next morning, I wasn't so much a Warrior as I was tired and sore. I was still pretty happy from the previous day, but knew I had to run a 10k. (Why oh, why!?)

I was excited as I milled about the start area, but knew this was not going to be a PR. I was just doing this to do it. I saw people I knew, and they saw me. Most people were running the 5k. I remembered this from last year, so wasn't intimidated.

The race started off fine, but then I really started to get sore. I just didn't have much juice in me. I felt rather deflated when one woman at the first water station said to her fellow volunteers, "Okay, we can stop pouring now. We're at the end. Just the walkers now."

But I kept going. I ran the downhill and flats, and walked the uphills. One elderly gentleman caught me on an uphill and laughed, "You take off like a rocket on the downhills, but I can catch you going uphill!" During one uphill we had a great conversation - he lives in the Sierras so is very used to hiking uphill - but then I finally took off for good. It was definitely fun to socialize a bit since I wasn't attempting to shatter any records.

The last 2 miles of the race were great - and the last quarter mile I ran at an 8.5 minute mile pace, which is very fast for me. So, I ended strong even though the rest of the race was pretty much a bust.

I was sad initially, but then figured that I had done two races in one weekend - became a Warrior, and definitely finished my second race strong even though I pretty much wiped-out on the first 4 miles of it. And that is better than sitting on the couch!