(Rinse and repeat for several rounds of "Bank of Awesomeness says the check was sent" versus "We haven't received it." Every time I cite the check number, amount, and date - and every time she asks me for the check number, amount and date as if I hadn't just told her. I cut-and-paste the online payment confirmation that clearly shows account 010101 paid $200 to Widgets and Sporks.)

[email, Bank of Awesomeness to me]
We phoned 800-DIM-BULB but the line has been consistently busy. We confirm that check #1234 in the amount of $200 to Widgets and Sporks for account 010101 was guaranteed-delivered on 10/15 and cleared on 10/21. Please give us an alternative phone number.

Hmmm, I wonder why the phone number Natalie gave me was 800-DIM-BULB? Wasn't it originally 800-WIDGET-3?

[email, me to Bank of Awesomeness]
Try 800-WIDGET-3

I look at the past emails about this case and see that Natalie's originate from Natalie@DimBulb.com.

I have a complete freak-out moment as I contemplate that I am a client of both Widgets and Sporks AND Dim Bulb. How many Natalie Knickerbocker-Shoehorns are there in the world? Clearly she works for both companies... But I'm up-to-date on both my Widgets and Sporks AND Dim Bulb accounts. What gives?

[me to Natalie@WidgetsAndSporks.com AND Natalie@DimBulb.com]
I just noticed that you work for both Widgets and Sporks and Dim Bulb. Which account is considered past due? I have that check #9876 in the amount of $500 was guaranteed-delivered on 10/14 to Dim Bulb for account 666666. And then Bank of Awesomeness just wrote me an email in which they state, "We confirm that check #1234 in the amount of $200 to Widgets and Sporks for account 010101 was guaranteed-delivered on 10/15 and cleared on 10/21." So both accounts are current.

[Natalie@DimBulb.com to me]
Please tell me the check number and amount.

[me to Natalie@WidgetsAndSporks.com AND Natalie@DimBulb.com]
Check #1234 in the amount of $200 for account 010101 to Widgets and Sporks was guaranteed-delivered on 10/15 and cleared on 10/21.... But then if you are emailing me about Dim Bulb, then check #9876 in the amount of $500 was guaranteed-delivered on 10/14 to Dim Bulb for account 666666.

[Natalie@DimBulb.com to me]
Oh, based on the copy of check #1234 that Bank of Awesomeness just sent me, you sent that to Widgets and Sporks for $200. That check was for Widgets and Sporks.

(Um, duh... yes, that is what I keep saying.... The invoice was for $200, and I paid $200... to Widgets and Sporks...)

I'm asking about the $100,000,000,000 invoice. When did you send that check?

[email attachment from Natalie@DimBulb.com to me - An invoice for $100,000,000,000 from Widgets and Sporks]

- - - - and there the communication ends... for now- - - -

As I look over the attached invoice, I am seriously confused. First, I'm expecting an invoice from Dim Bulb given that it is already clear that I paid my Widgets and Sporks invoice, because Natalie expressed surprise that the cleared check was for Widgets and Sporks to the point of redundancy, and because this invoice is coming from @DimBulb.com. But what you expect is not what you get. I open the invoice to discover that it is for a random account number 999999 for Widgets and Sporks, not the account 010101 I've already paid. And yet, the mailing address is correct as printed on the invoice.

But I've already received and paid a Widgets and Sporks invoice for September and for October.

Yet I haven't previously received this Widgets and Sporks invoice for September. (And that must mean there is one out there for October...)

So I apparently have TWO Widgets and Sporks accounts, one of which I've never heard of, nor for which I've received invoices.

How am I supposed to pay an invoice I've never received, especially if I never knew the account existed? Hmmm?

And yet I'm the one who figured out that there is a magical second account, despite constantly using the words "Widgets and Sporks" "account 010101" and "$200" in my communication while Natalie keeps using her Dim Bulb email account to ask about a previously unnamed account 999999 (which she still doesn't name in her email - I just noticed the different account number on the invoice) and the payment due of $100,000,000,000 (the amount of which had been until that last email not mentioned.) I had to figure out all the clues on my own even though I gave her plenty of information on my end.

So who's the dim bulb?

And yet I'm going to be the one cursed and without toes...

--
Update: I just learned - not from Natalie - that Widgets and Sporks sold a portion (just a portion!) of their company to Dim Bulb. Apparently, I have a mid-month invoice from "Widgets, Sporks, and Dim Bulbs" waiting for me at the office. And yet, I've already paid October 1st invoices from both companies (except for for this mysterious second Widget & Sporks account.) So... looks like a fourth account exists?

It would have been pretty easy for Natalie to have told me that there is a relationship between the two companies when I had expressed confusion over the accounts. It also would have been easy for her to notice that I kept referencing an account number and payment amount that was different than what she was seeking. And yet, as it is left now, I'm in trouble over missing payment of an invoice I never received in the first place for an account I didn't know existed. (Kinda reminds me of people who are furious at me for not returning email that they sent to random email addresses that aren't mine... or people who scream into answering machines that I haven't returned their call, but they don't leave a call-back number.)