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July 30, 2005

Walking Toys

I’ve always been a nail biter. But for the last couple years, I’ve done pretty well at keeping my nails out of my mouth. Unfortunately, that ended this morning. Fortunately, it was for a good cause.

I went to the BlogHer conference and was inspired and stunned. I had been thinking about having my own blog for awhile, and knew I would be motivated by the conference, but dramatically underestimated the power the discussions would have in stirring my thoughts. The “stunned” portion is a star-struck awe that many of the bloghers that I read on a daily basis were standing in front of me. I was tongue-tied. I bit my nails. Every time I think about how I actually met some people that were “famous,” my hands travel to my mouth. I was a nervous junior-high school student again: feeling awkward, ugly, and inarticulate.

On one hand, these bloghers were people that I had invited into my home via the computer, so I was pretty “familiar” with them. But since I was a reader without my own forum, they knew nothing of me. As a result, seeing them in person was a mix of strange emotions.

I felt as though I “knew” them since I had read their thoughts for an average of a year or more. So “small talk” was stunted because I knew a great deal about them. Yet I didn’t want to be rude by just staring and expecting them to entertain me as they do on my computer screen. I immediately recognized some of my favorite reads, but it was as though toys had come to life. I just stared as what I knew as a static photograph was walking around. I wanted to interact with them, but had difficulty knowing how to initiate conversation because gushing about their blog seemed so cliché.

I realize it sounds like heroine worship, and in a way it is. But perhaps by having my own blog I will inoculate myself from it a bit. For “BlogHer II” I will be able to march in knowing that I have a readership, even if it is just my husband. Of course, it is likely that I will still be star-struck by people that I consider celebrity. But perhaps I will have more confidence. After all, one main reason blogging is so wonderful is that anyone can have a voice. And after the conference, I realized that it is my turn.

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Posted by karianna at July 30, 2005 10:10 PM

Comments

Karianna, I think I speak for most bloggers when I say that we would LOVE to have someone come up and compliment our work. As you'll learn you blog alone in front of the screen and sometimes the post you think is brilliant is ignored, while people comment on some silly little thing you link to.

Gush away. I doubt anyone will mind :)

And by BlogHer '06 there will be people gushing about you!

Posted by: Elisa Camahort at August 7, 2005 06:21 PM

Thanks, Elisa! And thank you for making it all possible. I absolutely loved the conference and was so pleased to meet so many wonderful women. Thank you for doing such a fabulous job.

Posted by: Kari at August 8, 2005 09:46 AM